So this week is Suicide Prevention Week, which started with World Suicide Prevention Day yesterday. I speak out about this because I don’t want anyone else to feel alone like I did. People are always surprised when they find out.
“You seem so happy all the time, and you’re such a talented writer,” they say.
“They don’t know how close you came,” my friend Katie said, in response to what people tell me.
I’ve gotten a lot of help. They don’t know how bad it used to be.
The first time, I was only 14.
I wasn’t honest with myself about this until college. That’s when I started seeking help and I found out about TWLOHA through other friends who were vulnerable in sharing their own stories and bringing me towards healing.
Last year, four people from my church came up to me after a service and told me that I was brave for talking about this publicly, that breaking the silence about mental health issues inside the church as well as outside is needed, especially for teenagers who often already feel awkward and alone.
Thank you to everyone who donated to my birthday fundraiser benefitting TWLOHA last month, especially those who gave with volunteering and other efforts. TWLOHA’s theme this year is “I was made for.”
Thank you to everyone who talked me out of my thought spirals and held me during dark nights.
I am so glad to still be here, even though so many times I would have chosen differently.
This year, especially, I’ve learned that #IWasMadeFor community, for sharing even the painful and messy parts of life with some wonderful humans. I’m learning trust, that there are people who are real and ready to stick with you, even if you’ve been burned far too many times.
(If you need a little help today, please visit the find help page at twloha.com. They can help you find resources targeted to your area, as well as online and text options when face to face is still too much.)